My friend Bill is feeling stressed out with holiday gift-giving. Bill works long hours as an accountant for a major performance rights organization (a copyright collective), so he hasn’t been able to devote the time he should to choosing gifts. He’s also got a rather complicated family situation. His first marriage to Priscilla ended in divorce after three children, Elizabeth (now married with children), John, and Mary. His subsequent marriage with Cathy also ended in divorce. With Cathy, he had two children, Rachel and Seth. Bill presently is in a long-term relationship with Meena, and they have one daughter, Tara. Bill remains close with his only sibling Sophia, and tries not to forget about his parents on their birthdays, anniversary, and Christmas (Bill’s parents are Catholic, as was Priscillia, but Cathy is Jewish and Meena is Hindu, so Bill also has to watch for Hanakhah and Bali Padyami.) As you might imagine, gift-giving for Bill is complicated. Especially since he’s quite concerned about possible gift imbalances.
Bill has resolved to be a better gift-giver in the coming new year. Bill’s a guy whose been pushing numbers around spreadsheets for 50-60 hours a week for more than two decades. So of course he started with a spreadsheet. He set up a list of dates, persons, gifts, and gift costs for the gifts he gave in 2010. He created another list of persons, occasions, gifts, and estimated costs for the gifts he received in 2010. But what about the occasions on which he forgot to give gifts in 2010? He needs to compile those dates, too. To make appropriate compensations in 2011, he needs to calculate his 2010 gift cost balance for each person. But family life is much more complicated than that. He’s got to make sure that he’s not unduly favoring relationships from his second failed marriage relative to the first, even though he and Priscilla remain quite bitter (but he has a close, warm relationship with his daughter Elizabeth, whose mother is Priscilla). Similarly, if he gave an ex-in-law a nice gift in 2010, he wants to make sure he gave a nicer (more expensive) gift to Meena’s parents.
After spending the last two Saturday nights (annoying Meena) working on a gift data spreadsheet, Bill sought my advice. His fundamental gift problem, I told him, is that he hasn’t kept up with the development of new data tools. “I’ve already got a lot of gift data in a spreadsheet,” he complained. “I always use spreadsheets.” “I don’t need anything else.” “I don’t have time to learn anything new.” “I just want to figure out the right gifts, and be done with this business.” “Will you help me with this spreadsheet?”
I’ve known Bill for a long time, and he’s always been nice to me. I still remember when, two decades ago, his daughter Mary came over to our house for Susie’s big birthday party. We and all the kids sang Happy Birthday and a lot of other happy songs. We did that without purchasing any rights. Bill never reported us. Bill’s a swell guy at heart.
Here’s how I helped Bill. First, I used SDDL / STT to combine two tables he had set up and some other data into a big data list. Then I pulled that data list into Needle. Using Needle’s Thread query language, I weaved across the disparate data records to create some relevant, compact gift data tables. By sorting rows and creating, filtering and hiding columns, Bill had made in his spreadsheet a gift planning list similar to this. But he couldn’t create in a spreadsheet a list with persons sorted by first gift dates in the coming year, with person gift-dates grouped together and sorted for shrewd gift planning. To achieve his resolution of doing better in 2011, Bill needs to study his gift exchanges for 2010. In his spreadsheet he had set up a person gift-balance table like this. But what about family, what about relationships? They can’t endure without good gift-data calculations and analysis. So I swiftly created this gift exchange review by family group, and a similar review by relationship type (Needle really is sharp). Using SDDL / STT and his beloved spreadsheet program, Bill can easily record gifts as they occur in the coming year, without having to scroll around a big master table. He can then easily bring the additional data into Needle and do real-time gift exchange tracking and analysis.
Everyone wants to be a cheerful giver. Fine new data tools serve that purpose and ensure that you’ll warm hearts on all the gift-demanding days in your full calendar.